When Sex Is Painful-Here
is the solution
Dealing with
pain during sex
Because sex can be painful for many reasons,
and several factors could be causing the experience of pain during sex, finding
the solution can be a bit like solving a mystery (a very painful mystery). Not
all of these suggestions will apply to everyone, but here are some steps to
take
Take notes.
Try to figure out what’s going on.
Ask yourself some questions:
- When did sex start to hurt (has it
always hurt)?
- When does the pain begin (is it as
you’re getting excited, only during penetration, related to orgasm)?
- Where do you feel the pain (is it
in one specific area, or more general)?
- Are there still things you can do
sexually that don’t cause pain?
- Explore on your own.
- If you don’t regularly masturbate,
now’s the time to start.
If you can masturbate without pain, that is
both a helpful thing to know, but it can also provide you with much needed
release while you figure out how to resume sex with your partner without it
hurting. Using masturbation to explore sexual pain is particularly good because
you don’t have to worry about a partner poking you the wrong way. You can be as
gentle (or as rough) as you want to be, and you’re always in control. If
penetration with your partner is painful, you may want to use a vibrator or
dildo (with lots of lubricant) to explore penetration with masturbation, to
discover if it feels the same or different.
Use plenty of
lubrication.
One of the most common reasons for painful sex
is lack of lubrication. There are all sorts of reasons women experience vaginal
dryness, but using a personal lubricant can be an easy and effective way to
treat this problem and eliminate a major cause of painful sex.
Communicate with your
partner.
It can be difficult to talk about sex at the
best of times, even for couples who have been together for years. When it comes
to talking about a difficult sexual issue, the communication can get even
trickier. But communication is key to resolving painful sex. Even if the cause
is entirely physical, and will go away with treatment, it’s still important to
talk with your partner about the pain you’re experiencing and figure out other
ways for both of you to satisfy your sexual needs while you are getting
treated. This can actually be one of the positives of experiencing sexual pain,
it can force couples to break down communication barriers and eventually lead
to a better sex life than before the pain was experienced.
Experiment with different
sexual positions.
For some pain during sex happens as a result
of pressure on particular parts of the body. It may be putting pressure on
certain joints hurt, or that penetration at a certain angle is painful. Try
exploring different sexual positions, and see if this alleviates some of the pain.
Consult a doctor or sex
counsellor.
If you can, in most cases it is worth talking
with your doctor about this. Even if the problem clears up (or seems to clear
up) pain during sex can be a symptom of other issues, and knowing this can
alert your doctor to other questions they may want to ask.
==============================================================
Women's
Sexual Pain, If It's Not Vulvodynia or Menopause
An estimated 6-14% of women suffer from sexual pain and many more
postmenopausal women do. It may be menopause-related or it may be vulvodynia,
but there are many other potential causes, from dermatological diseases to
bladder conditions. Deep (abdominal) pain with penetration could be due to
endometriosis, fibroids, or previous pelvic surgery.
Here are a few other causes you and your doctor may want to consider:
Here are a few other causes you and your doctor may want to consider:
1. The Pill
Hormonal birth control can cause the same kind of sexual pain due to
lack of lubrication and vaginal atrophy that is normally seen in postmenopausal
women, says Andrew Goldstein, MD, an associate professor at George Washington
University and a specialist in vulvar pain. He says he's been seeing "a
ton of it" in the newer birth-control-pill formulations that have very low
oestrogen and a type of progestin that can lower testosterone. "I'm seeing
25-year-old women who have low desire and need lubricants, which is
ridiculous!" he says. That doesn't mean the pills are bad—"for a
large percentage of women, they're great," Dr. Goldstein says. But it does
mean that women should be aware that there may be sexual side effects to
hormonal birth control methods, which they can discuss with their doctor.
2. Cancer
treatment
"For women who have cervical or vaginal cancer and radiation, the whole vagina can become a rock-hard scar," says Irwin Goldstein, MD (no relation to Andrew), director of San Diego Sexual Medicine and the editor in chief of The Journal of Sexual Medicine. Also, "tamoxifen stops oestrogen from working," Dr. Goldstein adds, so breast cancer patients can have issues with vaginal dryness and atrophy, same as postmenopausal women and some birth control pill users. It's a tough situation, because systemic hormone replacement is not an option, as it may encourage the cancer. Some doctors, meanwhile, say local oestrogen is relatively safe. Other treatments may include physical therapy and sex therapy.
"For women who have cervical or vaginal cancer and radiation, the whole vagina can become a rock-hard scar," says Irwin Goldstein, MD (no relation to Andrew), director of San Diego Sexual Medicine and the editor in chief of The Journal of Sexual Medicine. Also, "tamoxifen stops oestrogen from working," Dr. Goldstein adds, so breast cancer patients can have issues with vaginal dryness and atrophy, same as postmenopausal women and some birth control pill users. It's a tough situation, because systemic hormone replacement is not an option, as it may encourage the cancer. Some doctors, meanwhile, say local oestrogen is relatively safe. Other treatments may include physical therapy and sex therapy.
3. Skin
problems
Problems with the skin in the genital area may be another reason for sexual pain. Common issues include childbirth lacerations or episiotomy scars, as well as dermatological diseases such as lichen sclerosis, or sexually transmitted infections such as herpes. One of Dr. Irwin Goldstein's patients came in with pain that ended up being traceable to a simple ingrown hair: "One of the pubic hairs grew into the skin and she had an infection of the clitoris," he says.
Problems with the skin in the genital area may be another reason for sexual pain. Common issues include childbirth lacerations or episiotomy scars, as well as dermatological diseases such as lichen sclerosis, or sexually transmitted infections such as herpes. One of Dr. Irwin Goldstein's patients came in with pain that ended up being traceable to a simple ingrown hair: "One of the pubic hairs grew into the skin and she had an infection of the clitoris," he says.
4. Physical
abnormalities
Dr. Andrew Goldstein says there are women who have imperforate hymens, but counsels a second opinion from a vulvar specialist before getting surgery. Many women who go in for hymenectomies actually have vulvar vestibulitis syndrome (VVS), which is often diagnosed by touching the area lightly with a Q-Tip. "If the hymen is too tight, the vestibule shouldn't hurt," he says. Women with VVS feel excruciating pain when specific areas are touched.
Dr. Andrew Goldstein says there are women who have imperforate hymens, but counsels a second opinion from a vulvar specialist before getting surgery. Many women who go in for hymenectomies actually have vulvar vestibulitis syndrome (VVS), which is often diagnosed by touching the area lightly with a Q-Tip. "If the hymen is too tight, the vestibule shouldn't hurt," he says. Women with VVS feel excruciating pain when specific areas are touched.
5. Vaginismus
This is an involuntary tightening of the vaginal and pelvic floor muscles that makes penetration painful or even impossible. Some women experience pain with any sort of penetration, including medical; for others, only sexual penetration hurts. Vaginismus can be a result of rape or other sexual abuse, but it can also develop as an aversive reaction to physical pain. "If you keep trying to have sex or insert a tampon and it's painful every time, eventually you tense your muscles; you're going to flinch,"
This is an involuntary tightening of the vaginal and pelvic floor muscles that makes penetration painful or even impossible. Some women experience pain with any sort of penetration, including medical; for others, only sexual penetration hurts. Vaginismus can be a result of rape or other sexual abuse, but it can also develop as an aversive reaction to physical pain. "If you keep trying to have sex or insert a tampon and it's painful every time, eventually you tense your muscles; you're going to flinch,"
The source of the pain must first be identified, and then the vaginismus can be treated with sex therapy, biofeedback (so the patient learns what her body is doing and can better control it), and dilator therapy. Is it in your head or your body? Doctors used to believe that women's complaints of sexual dysfunction were 90% psychological, 10% biological. "Now the thinking is 90% psychological, 75% organic," says Irwin Goldstein. What he means is that most sexual pain has a biological cause, but it usually also causes psychological issues. It makes sense: If sex hurts, you learn to fear it and avoid it. That's why the ideal is for sexual medicine doctors to work hand-in-hand with sex therapists.
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Clinic Doctors treats many cases of Dyspareunia, Pain during sexual intercourse, painful sex, with successful results. Many patients get relief after taking treatment
from Vivekanantha Clinic. You can
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9865212055 (Camp)
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